Archive for April, 2006

Sukisuki Beam

Friday, April 28th, 2006

I’ve been relatively tired of life lately… out of sorts, listless and sluglish. When I’m feeling down, my mind wanders to thoughts of… j-pop.

Morning Musume is a Japanese pop idol machine, running steadily since the late 90s. It’s kind of a combination of Menudo (girls “graduate” when they get too old) and a paramecium, since the number of members went from 3 to 5 to 7 to 11 to 26 in the span of 2 albums (I read another wag quip that at that rate of growth, by 2010, 90% of the population of Japanese teenage girls would be members of Morning Musume).

Another perimecium like quality that Morning Musume has is the way it often splinters off into “sub-groups,” often around a theme. My favorite (and most people’s favorite, since they have the longest discography, most cartoon incarnations, and the most merch) is Mini Moni—made up of 4 (or 5) of the shortest, youngest, and cutest members of Morning Musume. It totally fulfills my mental image of what Japanese pop music should look and sound like—shrill, robotic and crazy.

MiniMoni also displays the natural Japanese xenophobia/xenophilia in action by having the “American” member of the group (born in Hawaii but otherwise Japanese) always decked out in USA flag bandanas, flag shirts, flag overalls, or at the very least, something that DOESN’T MATCH the other members of the group. They also have her speak random blurts of English in song intros and such.

Another subgroup, in the following clip, is Coconuts Musume—made up of all Hawaiians. Some aren’t even Japanese! Or Asian! Two members of the group don’t even speak the language, so Japanese TV desides to exploit that fact by making them participate in food-based challenges… Let’s Challenge: Japanese Food!


I hear you, Danielle. Japanese food is fucking awful. Even the seeming neutral “beef bowl” will probably give you diarrhea from some hidden fish flakes or agar microbes they smuggle into the rice.

I read a little bit of their history on wikipedia. They said the non-Japanese members both quit after only a couple of years from stress and culture shock. Then the people they replaced them with also quit. I would LOVE to talk to them, I bet they have insane stories.

Who is Killing The (Baked Goods Made by the) Great Chefs of Europe?

Sunday, April 23rd, 2006

MURDER?MURDER?

Is this the end of Cakey? Who is this knife-wielding stalker?

FIND OUT at Channel 102!

Neat Art

Sunday, April 23rd, 2006

Check out Little India’s Power Puff Gods

Ultra Confidence

Saturday, April 22nd, 2006

A Smattering

Friday, April 21st, 2006

My throat is killing me. It came on all of a sudden today with no warning. I can’t tell if its a cold, since I have no other cold-like symptoms. It may be a reaction to pollen—I’m not generally allergic to anything in particular but a couple days in the fall and spring I sometime will feel crappy when the ragweed reaches critical mass.

Our toilet broke, which is a mere ellipsis in the hilarious picaresque adventures of our crumbling bathroom (subtitled “A Tragedy in Three Subfloor Replacements”), but was fixed before the day was over. Score one for Prestigious Management.

Cakey 3 is all in the can—we wrapped at 10 PM yesterday—but has to fight for our editor’s attention since he has another short film due the exact same day. This month went far too fast for us and as we learned from the other 102 prime timers, the feeling is common. None of those at the prime time panel on Wednesday had finished their shooting (one party hadn’t started yet).

I have… no leads… on the job hunt. I was despondent about in Tuesday, and still have no idea where my next meal is coming from. I have again come around to the conclusion that the only way to get a job anywhere is to know the person who hires you. Every job I’ve ever held I got in this way. I also observe that every job I would possibly apply for and have spit’s chance on a cast iron skillet of getting either requires mastery of a.) Flash or b.) Quark. I have no use for either of these programs in my life up until this point.

These are the only two programs that matter in the entire world. If the whole world was the monster.com graphic designer listings, a Sinbad-like stand up comic would be making loud observations about how Quark be different from Flash.

I want to buy new wigs.

The Archie Connundrum

Thursday, April 20th, 2006

Why do Archie comics exist? And continue to exist?

I mean, I enjoy them for seeing contemporary tween and teen trends co-opted awkwardly by 40 yearold writers. In my mind all the Archie writers are Jack Lemmon in Glengarry Glen Ross trying to figure out if the kids still think skateboarding is cool 15 minutes before deadline. The Dan DeCarlo-style art is adorable and dated (and creepy once you see all the tits-as-ass pinup stuff he did in the 50s using the same Betty and Veronica blank faces).

I can see why they continue to exist… they’re the one un-gendered and completely G-rated comic that kids can easily get at the supermarket. There’s no other comic that little girls eagerly read. But, they’ve remained unchanged in their crappiness for 60+ years. Except for Jughead’s Time Police—which I’ve used as shorthand for wonderful/terrible ideas every since I read about it in From Girls to Grrlz.

It was only the tip of the iceberg, as it turns out

How Droll.

Tuesday, April 18th, 2006

What if Spencer Gifts was run by high-end French designers with a penchant for visual puns…

atypyk.com

found on Drawn!

Free Advice

Monday, April 17th, 2006

If you’re in the market for a cake tray, or even a cake dome—go to Kmart. They have a wide array of fancy Martha Stewart cake stands simulating creamware and an extra-jumbo all-glass dome that’s tall enough to fit the tallest of cakes. All for under $20s.

Don’t go way out of your way to go to the specialty cake supply store on the west side to buy a Wilton plastic cake pedastal with a not-big-enough dome (the only one they carry) for thirty freaking dollars.

Learn from my missteps, readers.

Another Day Another Poster

Wednesday, April 12th, 2006

COVERS

A late-night cram session. For UCB LA. First Draft.

The blank area is where they will write in the name of the performers for that show. The pink “3D” lettering was computer-aided this time—The front face was made using Photoshop’s “Warp Text” tool on a plain font (I think it’s “Interstate”), slightly arcing it and vertically distorting it. I traced it into Illustrator to make it rougher and bumpier, put a half sized copy of the text in the background and drew the planes connecting them by eyeballing it.

Battle of the Bands Poster

Tuesday, April 11th, 2006

Battle of the Bands

I Love Egg in Translation

Thursday, April 6th, 2006

I Love Egg has been translated into English, but retains the original Korean ridiculousness.

No Posers No Posters

Wednesday, April 5th, 2006

I did this freehand on paper (then manually traced it into illustrator) without really measuring and really like how it turned out. I wanted to do the 3-D letters receding into the distance, carved of stone… the angles are just wonky enough and crude that it kinda takes it back down to earth.

No Posers 3D

I have another poster project coming up and I think I’ll try and do this again freehand with a different word.

I Read a Book

Monday, April 3rd, 2006

I started and finished The Golden Compass by Philip Pullman yesterday. I read his comments criticizing the inherent racism and sexism of the Narnia series and the general religiousity that pervades a lot of fantasy literature (and how his books attempt to circumvent it by being pro-science).

I read it all in one go, but I think it was more out of compulsion than interest. I tend to have a hard time stopping reading something once I start if I don’t have other distractions. I’ve done it with the last three or four books I’ve read (many of them epic fantasies—Wicked and Summerland).

People keep saying these are better than Harry Potter, but I wasn’t that invested in it. It’s definitely more morally ambiguous and complex than HP The central hook of the series’ world is that the soul is physically present in animal form—the daimon, which he does a lot with. The story was interesting, but in the end, I kinda just didn’t care. I think maybe my mind’s eye glazes over with fantasy epics.

Tails, Completed

Monday, April 3rd, 2006

Just got this approved, after many requests to make the dog cuter.

tails

Belated Animated Feature Round-Up

Sunday, April 2nd, 2006

I finally got around to seeing Howl’s Moving Castle, which I’ve had sitting around since the Netflix came last week and with that, I have now seen all the 2005 Oscar “Best Animated Feature” nominees. All three of them.

There are spoilers here, but if you waited longer than me to see these, you deserve spoilers.

Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Wererabbit is very cute in an unexplainable stodgy British way. Much like the bow-tie wearing creators accepting their Oscar, it’s refreshingly unhip and somewhat embarrassing for the fun it seems to be having without consequence.

I love how there are echos of classic (‘30s-’50s) film genres in all the Wallace and Gromit films (Trousers: heist film, Close Shave: suspense/’Rebeccatype thriller, WereRabbit: Universal monster/horror), flavoring them, but the essential feel and nature of W&G is consistant between them. I think The Wrong Trousers, the second W&G short, is pretty much the pinnacle and neither subsequent offering comes close to its action, suspense and humor. I liked Were-Rabbit and it didn’t feel “long” despite it being a feature. I also thought it was interesting, after watching some of the bonus features, that even as it was being animated they were changing the plot and trying to figure out where it was going… there were at least 5 different endings at different points.

The downside, alas, Curse of the Were-rabbit felt a bit predictable at parts and seemed trying to “redo” bits from the shorts in a less effective way—“Hutch” the Rabbit was much less endearing than “Shawn,” the airplane chase at the Manor was very similar to scenes in A Close Shave, and Gromit looked constipated/depressed most of the film.

Howl’s Moving Castle was certainly interesting, but not nearly as engaging as Spirited Away. I’m pretty lukewarm on the Studio Ghibli output… I love their intentions but if I were to tar all of their output with an overly simplistic slam-brush I’d go for “boring.” Their plots seem to ramble along without any direction for a lot of the time. Despite the very “Japanese” mileu for Spirited Away (matsuri, public bath house, shikigami, dragon-river spirit, ) it seemed to me to have the most ‘Western’ plot structure, falling lockstep in with the model of Alice in Wonderland and Wizard of Oz.

Howl is an adaption of a British fantasy novel, which I’ve never read and know almost nothing about. I’m curious about it actually and might want to pick up a copy (but I went out and bought The Golden Compass at Strand instead… close enough). According to Wikipedia—“Roughly the first third of the plot is similar, after which the movie branches off into original territory, flavored with many of Miyazaki’s familiar themes: airships, redemption, cute non-human sidekicks.”

So, the stuff that I thought was great about the story—the plain but practical girl heroine (such a rarity in most kid flicks, save Miyazaki’s, of course) who becomes an old woman (a crone as the hero of a kid flick! Not since The Peanut Butter Solution!)—were undercut by “airships, redeption, cute non-human sidekicks.” Miyazaki also flopped the gender of the main antagonist to a woman for an unknown reason. Disney seems to do that too… the hero and villian are usually of the same gender. A lot of stuff happens that doesn’t seem to matter (Howl freaking out over his hair turning orange and then melting into green slime, the penultimate villian is vanquished and then invited to live with them for no reason as a senile invalid) and the ending just… happens.

So, I guess the pattern with my reviews is… these were OK, but go see the earlier stuff from the same people. Now, watch me throw a curveball—
The Corpse Bride was almost unwatchable. There’s a great internal balance in film-goers for Tim Burton’s output that waffles between “creative visionary” and “Hot Topic hack” and a 16 ton weight was dropped on the latter, neatly atop Ape-rham Lincoln. It goes without saying that Nightmare Before Christmas is a huge thing to follow in the frame-by-frame animated footsteps of and I fully expected Corpse Bride to be in some areas difficient—crappy story, great visuals – fine; slower pace, more mundane setting—ok; fewer songs, bad ending—I’ll suck it up.

I’m hard-pressed to find one nice thing to say about this stop-motion turkey. The character designs were awkward—buggy “shocked” eyes, tiny un-expressive mouths, unbalanced bodies. The way they moved was jerky and stiff. The background characters were poorly cribbed from the waiting room of scene of Beetlejuice. The mercifully few songs sounded like word-heavy rough-drafts of the “Oogy Boogy” number that managed neither to explain what was happening, be pleasing to the ear, or distract from the crude day-glo “dancing” that accompanied them as the film expected them to do all three simultaneously. One nice thing…. there weren’t any Smashmouth songs.

The worst offender, as is usually the case, was the writing. Aside from not being “funny” when joking, the basic thrust of the plot doesn’t make sense. Victor, a bland simp, has been arranged to marry a girl he’s never met (Victoria) but immediately after meeting her for a five word scene, he’s tricked into marrying The Corpse Bride, who he also has barely said five words to either. So, it’s a love triangle between three strangers. Why do we care?

There is also a green worm doing a bad Peter Lorre impression.