The Archie Connundrum
April 20th, 2006Why do Archie comics exist? And continue to exist?
I mean, I enjoy them for seeing contemporary tween and teen trends co-opted awkwardly by 40 yearold writers. In my mind all the Archie writers are Jack Lemmon in Glengarry Glen Ross trying to figure out if the kids still think skateboarding is cool 15 minutes before deadline. The Dan DeCarlo-style art is adorable and dated (and creepy once you see all the tits-as-ass pinup stuff he did in the 50s using the same Betty and Veronica blank faces).
I can see why they continue to exist… they’re the one un-gendered and completely G-rated comic that kids can easily get at the supermarket. There’s no other comic that little girls eagerly read. But, they’ve remained unchanged in their crappiness for 60+ years. Except for Jughead’s Time Police—which I’ve used as shorthand for wonderful/terrible ideas every since I read about it in From Girls to Grrlz.
It was only the tip of the iceberg, as it turns out
April 20th, 2006 at 11:16 am
There are SO many wonderful things on that link…
“... the stool was an interdimensional gateway that transported Jughead to the world of Dinersville, where everybody is obsessed with diners!”
“Every issue also contained one appearance from a little boy named Justin. You knew it was him because he wore a shirt with “Justin” on it, and good thing too because depending on who was drawing, he looked different.”
“First, you had to forget everything you assumed you knew about Jughead. It turned out the real reason he wore that stupid hat all the time was because it was a time-travelling device…and the real reason he wasn’t interested in any of the Riverdale girls was because his TRUE girlfriend lived in the 29th century.”
“...In his original run, “SUPER DUCK” WASN’T A SUPERHERO. He was just called “super” because he could talk.”
“Sales of Jughead’s Time Police were so bad, creator/writer Rich Margopolous published a sob note in issue #3 complete with a drawing of him crying. I kid you not.”
Archie Andrews, you are the best.