Sukisuki Beam
April 28th, 2006I’ve been relatively tired of life lately… out of sorts, listless and sluglish. When I’m feeling down, my mind wanders to thoughts of… j-pop.
Morning Musume is a Japanese pop idol machine, running steadily since the late 90s. It’s kind of a combination of Menudo (girls “graduate” when they get too old) and a paramecium, since the number of members went from 3 to 5 to 7 to 11 to 26 in the span of 2 albums (I read another wag quip that at that rate of growth, by 2010, 90% of the population of Japanese teenage girls would be members of Morning Musume).
Another perimecium like quality that Morning Musume has is the way it often splinters off into “sub-groups,” often around a theme. My favorite (and most people’s favorite, since they have the longest discography, most cartoon incarnations, and the most merch) is Mini Moni—made up of 4 (or 5) of the shortest, youngest, and cutest members of Morning Musume. It totally fulfills my mental image of what Japanese pop music should look and sound like—shrill, robotic and crazy.
MiniMoni also displays the natural Japanese xenophobia/xenophilia in action by having the “American” member of the group (born in Hawaii but otherwise Japanese) always decked out in USA flag bandanas, flag shirts, flag overalls, or at the very least, something that DOESN’T MATCH the other members of the group. They also have her speak random blurts of English in song intros and such.
Another subgroup, in the following clip, is Coconuts Musume—made up of all Hawaiians. Some aren’t even Japanese! Or Asian! Two members of the group don’t even speak the language, so Japanese TV desides to exploit that fact by making them participate in food-based challenges… Let’s Challenge: Japanese Food!
I hear you, Danielle. Japanese food is fucking awful. Even the seeming neutral “beef bowl” will probably give you diarrhea from some hidden fish flakes or agar microbes they smuggle into the rice.
I read a little bit of their history on wikipedia. They said the non-Japanese members both quit after only a couple of years from stress and culture shock. Then the people they replaced them with also quit. I would LOVE to talk to them, I bet they have insane stories.